It’s been an exhausting week. We’ve got a bathroom remodel on our hands and just keeping up with the little ones is tough for me at I near full-term with Baby Gwen. I am so grateful for my sweet husband who still writes me love notes with wildflowers to encourage me after almost 7 years of marriage. And it’s hard to be discouraged when you’re faced with these sweet smiles:
The Carrots FB page now has over 1,000 followers! Can’t believe it! I love the lively and encouraging discussion that happens over there. Thank you!
In the Liturgical Year: It’s still Eastertide! Does your family have special music you listen to during this season? Tell me about it! I need some ideas.
Pregnancy Update: Nearing 37 weeks. Still teaching ballet and feeling generally good except for some fatigue and the dreadful acid reflux.
Links:
How to Pray the Rosary with Children at Catholic Mothers Online
Why the Fuss About Reading Mommy Blogs? at DoubleThink
Beauty? Don’t Buy It at Surviving Our Blessings
Must-Read Links About Kids in Mass:
You simply must read two great posts this week on why kids should be in Mass and not seen as unwanted distractions:
Screaming Babies in Mass, and on the Internet at Barefoot and Pregnant
Children Belong at Mass. Period. at Fountains of Home (and Fountains of Home has a FB page now so hope on over and start following Christy’s awesomeness!)
All the controversy over this issue makes me so unbelievably grateful for the support our parish gives to young families that I wrote about in How My Kids Didn’t Ruin Mass. Last week the sweet elderly behind us that had to struggle through all of Lucy’s wriggling and chatter and kept her entertained with smiles and peekaboo told us afterwards, “Thank you for sharing her with us today!” as if WE had done THEM some sort of big favor. The grace of Our Lord!
I am so glad that the Women Speak on NFP series has been so helpful to so many! Although it will start winding down next week, I think it will continue to be an occasional feature over here at Carrots. I’m really excited about all the great things I’m learning about NFP and being inspired by your stories. I’m going to compile all my thoughts about what I’ve been learning into a post and I’m also putting together a list of links and resources on NFP to share with you at the end. Still ahead: an introduction to the Marquette method, NFP while nursing/post-partum, when NFP doesn’t “work,” the idea of natural gender selection, and more. If you missed one of our recent NFP contributors (the wonderful Dwija’s) recent post over at House Unseen, please, please, do yourself a favor and check it out: “NFP doesn’t work. You have so many kids!” Love it!
Wishing you a gorgeous weekend!
Love,
Haley
P.S. You can also follow me on Twitter (@haleycarrots), Pinterest (haleyofcarrots), FB, and Instagram (carrotsformichaelmas). I love connecting with my wonderful readers!
Thanks for the NFP series; it has been very informative and timely! Another great blog post on taking children to Mass can be found on the Happily Even After blog at the USCCB’s website http://www.foryourmarriage.org!
I’m so glad, Sarah! And I’ll check out that post!
Loved the linked articles on children in the mass. I had to share them both on Facebook. The church we belong to has started implementing a “children’s mass” at one of the Sunday masses – the kids can go down with a teacher and do one reading and the Gospel in a more kid friendly setting and they then discuss them together before coming back up to their parents after the homily. Now I like the kid friendly idea, but how do they learn about the mass and how to participate when they miss half of it? It’s like the letter that spurred the articles you posted; the kids should stay home until they can behave in mass. It’s like the school telling you that the kids can attend, but not until they learn everything first. ?? Say what?? Yeah, in order to learn, you have to be there and learn it. Wow, and shame on those people who think the children shouldn’t be there! Luckily we’ve only gotten compliments on our kids being at church and older members thanking us and loving to see us every week. Hopefully the disapprovers will just keep it to themselves (as they ought to).
PS: I loved your earlier post about taking Benjamin and Lucy to church, it was like you were sitting with us at our church :).
Totally agree, Becky. How can they learn to behave in Mass without ever practicing? I know my kids need all the practice they can get! And I’m encouraged to hear that you’ve been supported by your parish for bringing your kids in Mass. It makes me so sad to hear of young families who don’t feel welcome in Mass of all places!
I get very anxious about the ‘kid-friendly’ Mass idea for another reason, too: kids need to enter the Mystery of the Mass. As they grow up and gain awareness, they will realize that being part of a Mystery every week is part of their lives, and hopefully they will love the experience. Hopefully they’re hearing beautiful music, smelling incense, seeing Mommy & Daddy pray… and generally getting a sense that something special is going on here, long before they understand what it is.
This business of taking kids away from that Mystery or dumbing it down for them bothers me. I worry that those kids are the ones who are going to grow up without any deeper sense of what is taking place at Mass… and eventually dropping out when they reach college or no longer have a strong family impetus to attend.
No only do they have to learn how to behave, but they have to learn that something truly *other* is happening and they are invited into it – and always have been.
These are great insights, Deirdre. One of the things that first attracted us to the Catholic Church was that everyone is welcome and everyone is TOGETHER. There’s not a separate “heritage” service for the older folks, a “modern” service for the college students, or a “children’s church” option. It’s so important to consider the ramifications of creating a “consumer” style worship.
Thank you for the mass articles! My kids are past the crying baby stage, but I’m still so self-conscious when they’re not silent and “perfect” at mass.
Me, too! I’m pretty sure that your own kids always sound 10 times louder to you than to anyone else, haha.
I guess I am very fortunate — I never even heard of anyone complaining about children at Mass until the recent online uproar about it! I also grew up with the (perhaps not terribly spiritual) attitude that you go to Church every Sunday because you are obligated to: Because God Said So. So, it doesn’t matter how you feel — fulfilled, supported, enriched — or whether you enjoy the Mass or even think you got something out of it (obviously you do get graces) — you go because you are doing what God told you to do! (If you do get some extra great feeling, awesome — but that’s not WHY you went.) That seems both to require Catholic parents of little ones (and the baptised little ones, too — they are also Catholics!) to attend Mass — and to require people like the question-asked to attend Mass for the sake of obeying God rather than enjoying the service like it’s an opera (to which I would not bring my toddler).
I can’t imagine anything more miserable than trying to coordinate schedules and Masses and leaving babies at home and splitting up families on a Sunday morning. It’s one thing if a child is ill, but to ask a family to do this a regular basis? And what are the chances that either parent or child will go back to regular Church-going after 5 years of staying home? (Not to mention that for a young mother, this could amount to staying home for the entire 10-20 years of childbearing!)
Great points, Bernadette. I think your insight about what staying home instead of attending Mass with small children would mean to a young mother is so important. If you have more than the national average of children, you’re expected to stay home from say, age 25 to age 45? We’ve had an infant with us in Mass since I was 23 and we may continue to have infants in Mass until our early forties. Does that mean we aren’t welcome for TWENTY YEARS?
I am also surprised when I hear negative attitudes about children in Mass because we have been so fortunate to be encouraged by the parishes where we have attended. And if I ever see what I think might be a glare, there are three or four smiles and sweet comments by kind parishioners to balance it out!